Parent Network Day: “The most amazing and invaluable experience I believe I will ever have on this journey.”

On a sunny Saturday in June, parents from all over England gathered in Leeds for a Parent Network Day, organised by Parents Against Child Sexual Exploitation (Pace).

Empowered parents took the opportunity to speak to others whose families have endured similar experiences. Some regular attendees at these thrice-yearly events valued the chance to catch up with one another. Everyone shared heart-rending stories of their attempts to keep their children safe and disrupt the perpetrators.

The event organiser Pauline Bainbridge (National Parent Support Work Coordinator for Pace) said, ‘Coming together with others on the same path combats the isolation felt by many parents of sexually exploited children.’

For one third of attendees, it was their first time at such an event. One first-time parent wrote a summary of how she felt about the day:

I was totally moved by the warmth and empathy of the workers and the strength of all those parents I met. It allowed me to share my situation in such a warm, welcoming, supportive environment with such incredible people. I felt so safe; to be allowed to discuss, explore and come to terms with my situation, more importantly it has given me the positive strength and determination to move forward with my once heavy heart, which is now rich with hope. Sharing both mine and all those other parents’ experiences has inspired me immensely with hope and given me a great deal of strength.

It was an action-packed day, with small “sharing groups” in the morning, in which parents took turns to recount some of their experiences. As parallels were drawn, parents realised they were not the only ones whose lives had been radically affected by the grooming and abuse of their children. The mutually supportive atmosphere enabled parents to openly discuss the devastating effects their child’s abuse has had on their families. As always at these days of sharing, parents talked about the enormous lengths they go to, to keep their children safe.

Parents told of their hopes and frustrations about the role of the criminal justice system in protecting their children. During the afternoon, one group came together to make suggestions for future policy developments, while another shared survival tips. Parents needing time to de-stress attended a relaxation workshop.

The camaraderie over lunch showed that connections between families’ experiences of child sexual exploitation cut across potential differences to do with social background. If there is a message to be carried forward from Parent Network Day, it is that the problem stems from the criminals involved, not from the characteristics of affected families.